Monday, August 3, 2009

LOLSpath


Haven't done one of these in a while. I am quite honestly surprised that the idea had legs enough for three posts, never mind eleven of them.

The above is a picture of the fifteen four-inch Spathiphyllums I bought at Lowe's last Thursday. Why so many? Indeed, why any at all, given that I'm not that fond of them? They were only $0.50 apiece (marked down from $0.99 (marked down from $1.99 (marked down from $3.97))), and I didn't see anything wrong with them, other than the dead flowers needed to be pulled off. Which apparently Lowe's finds it more time-effective to hand-write little yellow stickers with new prices on them than to just clean up the plants occasionally. (It must be such a weird place for anyone who's actually fond of plants to work. Comments can be anonymous here at PATSP, so come on, oppressed big box garden center workers: tell me some stories.)

Anyway. I figure I know how to keep them going well enough, I can keep them for a little while and then resell them through the consignment store in Iowa City that accepts plants (my cut of which would likely be $1.50). Good for me, and better for the plants than lingering for days and then getting tossed in a dumpster. Or whatever it is Lowe's does with the plants they kill. If I'd wanted, I could have gotten another, like, 25 of them, but 15 already seemed excessive. (I mainly got that many so I could take the flat they were in as well: I am seriously coveting plastic flats lately.)

It's not especially lucrative, but you have to go with the opportunities you see. In theory.

When I mentioned this at Twitter on Thursday, sometime PATSP commenter Lance suggested that "Flip This Plant" would make a good new show for Bravo (especially since "Flip This House" appears to be in a bit of trouble, conceptually: hard to flip houses when nobody's buying them, much less resell them for more money than you bought them for). I'm afraid it would be kind of slow. Maybe it's more HGTV's speed. I'm open to being the object of a bidding war. Bravo, HGTV: my e-mail address is in the sidebar. Have at.


11 comments:

sheila said...

I'd watch Flip This Plant on HGTV! :)

Water Roots said...

I'd watch Flip This Plant too! Cool name for a show...

Anonymous said...

I'm not a big box employee, but I do buy plants there from time to time and their practises amaze me. Several times I've made offers on plants at the end of the season - half price or something like - and am told it's against their policy. So what do they do with the plants? They stop caring for them and load them into a dumpster. Nice stuff like hollies, shrubs and perennials that only need some tlc to regain their health and good looks. I froth, I wail, but wow, it's against the policy to make $15.00 instead of $30.00. Go figure.

John said...

I'd also watch Flip That Plant. Maybe Paul James (from HGTV's Gardening By The Yard) could do it. He has the right sense of humor.

Kenneth Moore said...

Hah! I haven't seen any previous LOLSpath posts, but darn, they're fun! My favourite is the "I has a man" one.

So, I don't know what "Flip This House" is, not having had a TV in almost a decade, but could "Flip This Plant" include plant juggling contests? To win, you have to juggle the BDSP and a few Euphorbia?

mr_subjunctive said...

I think my favorite is "My pollinz -- let me show you them," just because it's one of the few where the plant is kind of "gesturing" in a way that makes the joke work. (For me.) But hey.

Pam said...

...or 'Flip this tree'? There could be the 0-1', 1-3', 3-5' tree flip...and the show's finale could be the flip of a huge live oak...

hydrophyte said...

Back in the day I never had any fondness for spaths, but suddenly they are my new favorite plant. I have run into more than a few new accessions at big box stores.

Peace lilies have always seemed so pedestrian to my eyes. I find I like their looks without those always-the-same flowers, so I just decapitate them whenever I see new blooms.

sheila said...

No, no, Paul James can't host the show, mrsubjunctive must do it!

Spaths bore me, I've seen far too many of them, not unlike Stella d'oro daylilies. But I do like the flowers, I would never cut them off (except I cut off the part with the messy pollen on it right away).

hydrophyte said...

I wonder why plant breeders haven't been able or haven't tried to get more variation from spaths(?). 'Gloden Glow' really is pretty cool because it's different. I have another one 'Jetty Junior' that is unique and useful for me because it stays real small.

I wonder about acquiring species Spathiphyllum(?). I have looked around and I couldn't find any collectors in the US. The Wikipedia entry lists more than 40 species.

mr_subjunctive said...

I don't know. I mean, I haven't seen anything about species Spathiphyllums anywhere, even as photographs.

There are at least a few cultivars that are different. I've seen a silvery-gray one before, for example (I didn't buy it, though, because it seemed like I had enough Aglaonemas that were doing the same thing, but better.). And 'Domino.'

My impression is that considerably more breeding/engineering work goes into the flowers: bigger, smaller, scented, longer-lived, less sensitive to time of year, etc., because people are more likely to buy them when they're flowering even if the flowers ain't all that. But it's also possible that people are trying, and the plant's genes are just not co-operative.