Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Picture: Ladybug on Jade Cuttings


I am having a very bad day yesterday, and as a result, I respectfully request that readers supply their own commentary for this post.

(It's nothing to worry about. I'll likely be fine by the time you read this.)

-

UPDATE: I in fact am fine. Disruptions in my sleep schedule are highly correlated to flare-ups of the ol' depression, and such a disruption happened yesterday morning.

Unfortunately, knowing that there is no rational basis for the way I'm feeling, and that it's all just a matter of me having gotten up too early, does absolutely nothing to blunt the unpleasantness. So I just have to ride it out for the 6-12 hours it lasts.

The good news is that my brain is extraordinarily predictable about the whole business, and there are certain subjects I only think about during these depressive episodes (Mostly prior employers and how badly we failed and disappointed one another, especially a job four jobs ago which I left in 2004 under traumatic and confusing circumstances.), which makes it much easier to identify what's going on and withdraw from the world until the storm has passed. Though experience is teaching me that I should be withdrawing much, much more thoroughly from Twitter when this is happening than I have so far been able to do. Something about how people are on Twitter really pushes my buttons sometimes.


13 comments:

lynn'sgarden said...

Love this photo!
It's ok for you to take a break,
Mr_Subj., especially because there's nothing for us to worry about...
But hope your day is looking up...

Ginny Burton said...

What a sweet way to start the day! Hope you're feeling better; just looking at that pretty ladybug cheered me right up.

li said...

I'm a sucker for ladybugs, so thanks for the photo.

I'm sorry your day sucked. You should always take care of yourself first, your readers second (we'll be fine, we promise, and we will wait for you!).

CelticRose said...

Cool photo!

Hope you're feeling better soon, Mr. S.

Melanie said...

great photo! Depression is a horrible thing to climb out of again and again. Look after yourself, indulge in things that make you feel good :)

Anonymous said...

Routing blew it again, this is supposed to be the geranium.


One reason dogs are wonderful - they love you no matter what. Plants do too, but they do tend to show disappointment while I've never had a dog to whom I was anything but constantly constant (I assume this makes some sense). Friends are the same, more like dogs than plants, so we all hope that better comes soon.

tjbroccoli said...

What??!! no commentary for the bug and jade??
Man, bloggers are such strange plants.

Lance said...

Hope I'm not pushing buttons. Everyone needs some withdraw time though.

mr_subjunctive said...

Lance:

No, you're not pushing buttons. (Tjbroccoli should maybe watch him/rself, though.)

It's not really anybody in particular, or anything they actually say; it's more the kind of communication that happens on Twitter. And most of the time, I deal with it just fine anyway. It's kind of hard to pin down. I just know that there are certain days where it's just a bunch of self-promotion, horoscopes, conversations among groups I'm not actually part of, people spouting off about things they obviously don't understand, and platitudes. Which are all things I actually go to the internet to get away from.

(Shorter above: Twitter is maybe a little too much like being in a large crowd of people I barely know to be comfortable for me.)

Plus it's a huge time suck, and I often don't even actually enjoy it, except insofar as I sometimes have brief conversations with people I would otherwise not encounter -- there are a number of other plant bloggers there who I know pretty much only from Twitter, not from their blogs -- and I have occasionally been directed to interesting links I would otherwise not have encountered.

Now that I've written this all out, it looks like I'm probably going to be deleting my account at some point in the nearish future: if I can't come up with any higher praise than the above, clearly it's not really doing me any good.

Lance said...

I do understand. I use twitter mainly for news alerts more than anything else. But I would miss your occasional comment there if you do delete.

Christine said...

Well, if it makes you feel any better, I read your pitch on Casa Coniglio on why we should all move to Iowa to survive the zombiocalypse and I think I might have to arm wrestle your biggest fan to win their title. Disclaimer, however is that I live in sunny California and arrogantly think I'd be able to survive the zombies without help from the Amish/Mennonites/etc.

tjbroccoli said...

My apologies if my joke was inappropriate and not funny. big fan of your blog.

Ginny Burton said...

Oh yes, please get rid of Twitter! Or at least don't post you tweets where those of us who don't tweet can see them. It feels exactly like listening to someone's cell phone conversation while standing in line. Also like high school, where the popular kids would use all sorts of references I couldn't understand if I tried to join the group.

Your blog is perfect as it is.